Why I Left the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

On Sunday, April 5, I called my bishop and informed him that I was leaving the church (the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints). I drafted a formal letter requesting the removal of my name from the records of the church and mailed it the following day, April 6. This series of actions is the culmination of over a year and half of seeking a manifestation from God, i.e. evidence for the validity of the concept God or the concept spirit, after realizing in November 2007 that my belief in God was founded purely on feelings and thoughts, not grounded in any valid sensory percepts. I can say without reservation that I find no evidence for God or spirit(beyond the consciousness arising from the brain) and that feelings and imagination are not valid means of apprehending reality.

My choice to leave the church is based on those experiences, failing to find manifestations of God or spirit by means that the church teaches – study of the scripture, pondering, fasting and prayer, participating in church activities and serving others. In the church, I find a collection of both true and arbitrary teachings and activities motivating the actions of a spectrum of people with varying mixtures of good and bad. No individual’s actions other than my own motivated my decisions. I did not leave to justify a specific behavior that contradicts the church’s teachings (a frequent straw man I think many members use to evade honest appraisal of their beliefs when someone leaves). I left with a clear conscience that I have tried the church’s methods on its own terms and failed to come to the same answers.

The church teaches that, when its adherents feel the importance of the church's teachings, they will want to share it with others, yet they criticize the “apostate’s” desire to do the same, deriding it as “kicking against the pricks”. I have intentionally avoided so-called “anti-Mormon” writings because I wanted to be free from their influence in coming to conclusions and re-evaluate the church on its own terms. My main source of LDS-specific skeptical information comes simply from the Wikipedia and from apologist writings at FARMS or FAIR. I have consulted these sources only in an attempt to understand the evidence for facts avoided or glossed over in my Sunday school, seminary and institute classes. My objections to the church come from primarily epistemological grounds and very basic metaphysical issues, not the arcana of Joseph Smith's life or the Book of Mormon's descriptions of pre-Columbian America. I may blog more specifically on my epistemological, metaphysical and ethical objections to church doctrine in the future.

For working through the broader metaphysical and epistemological issues associated with theism, I am specifically grateful to the writings of Dawson Bethrick and Anton Thorn (both of whom do not know me). I also acknowledge Ayn Rand for developing and publishing a cogent philosophy for life on this earth. I find Objectivism true in every regard that I understand and accept it as my personal philosophy for living.

I do not deny the good that exists within the church nor that I have received many benefits from the actions of individuals in the church. Fundamentally, I would not exist without the church. My parents met through church-sponsored dances. My paternal grandparents met because my grandfather was a missionary for the church in England and my grandmother a member of the church there. My paternal grandfather’s ancestors and my maternal maternal great-grandparents all immigrated to the United States so that they could live among fellow church members. I met my wife through attending church meetings, and we only considered even dating because we were both members of the church. Personally, I learned the life-affirming virtues of honesty, integrity and self-reliance beginning from the church’s teachings. I also first learned from church doctrine that moral perfection is attainable, that all truth is related and that knowledge of the truth makes human progress possible.

My exit from the church does not diminish my gratitude for my parents’ rearing nor the value that my wife, parents, siblings, grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles and in-laws have been and are in my life, the majority of whom are active members of the church. I do not include my children in the list, even though they are great values to me, because they are not yet church members. By our agreement, my wife will continue to raise them in the church, acknowledging that they will attain full freedom of choice once they reach maturity and I will not conceal my understanding from them. My wife continues to love me, despite not supporting my decision to leave the church. I look forward to a life of continuing happiness based on living in full harmony with my understanding of reality.

Update: Fixed links.